Kasabay ng mga Alon



Baybayin ng Tiwi, Albay.

Ang dumi mo na :( Nakakalungkot. 

Isa ka sa mga paborito kong puntahan kapag gusto ko ng katahimikan. Ang sarap lang pakinggan ng mga alon at ng ihip ng hangin. 

Nakakapagod mag-isip. Ayokong mag-isip. Pwede bang hindi na lang mag-isip?

Lolo Eutiqz

Dear Lolo, 

I haven't cried yet. Oh okay. I cried a little last night. You should be proud of me. I also felt guilty. I should have fulfilled my promise of coming home to visit you and lola. I shouldn't have the second thoughts. I shouldn't have applied for a job too soon. 
Probably, I would have seen you still alive. Probably, had I been there to remind you to keep fighting and be strong to stay live because you still need to see your great grandkids from me, you're still alive right now. I can always hear you chuckle whenever I say that. 

I remember that whenever you get hospitalized, I really don't wanna visit you there, I don't wanna see you weak and fragile. But once you are back home, You see me there. 

I want you to know that I am proud of you that you are my lolo. For me, you are an epitome of a good man. A good husband, father, provider and grandfather you had been. 

You were a carpenter. I remember looking at you sharpening your tools ad telling me that it is very important for keep sharp tools. You were a farmer. You rise up so early in the morning. Prepping either for planting season or harvesting. I remember that day I tried helping you with sun-drying the grains of rice. You forgot to tell me to wear a coverall. After 3 baths, my body still felt itchy and I was red all over. The only way for me to take a rest from scratching was after popping that antihistamine that I always hated taking in. After that, never again did you let me help you. After a long day's work, I see you capping the day by eating "nganga" and with a bottle of gin or tanduay. 

You were my defender during the times when Lola and my two titas scold me a lot.    You were always there to comfort me and tell me to finish my studies. 

I have a lot of stories about you. Living with you and Lola, I saw how much respect you have for her. A true gentleman, you were. My favorite story from  you will always be your courtship story with lola. How a "bilao" of "sinapot" (fried flour-coated bananas) won her heart. From there, you got eight kids and from eight kids, 21 grandkids and 3 great grand kids. 

Lolo, the kind-hearted that you are, I'm thinking that your sudden passing was your way of not giving people you love a hard time taking care of you. You are the kind of guy who don't want to inconvenience others but would go an extra mile to help others. 

Not so many things had changed since the day I moved Manila. I'm still your cry-baby favorite apo. Haha. 

Lolo, you are an epitome of a good man. I'm so blessed to have be surrounded by good men in my life--- you, my father, my uncles and my sibs. 

I know you're in heaven looking after all of us now. I will surely miss your presence.  

I'm almost done and I'm starting to cry. I promise, I won't cry a lot this time. You're not beside me to comfort me. Labyu, Lolo Eutiqz. 

Your Apo,
Kathy


All in Week's Work

I had completed two modules for one subject today. I am procrastinating on the other subject because I am really having a hard time on it. *sigh* 

Today is the Graduation Day of our 5-day Daily Vacation Bible School! I am so happy that I got to complete it this year. From day 1 to day 5! 


I had been assigned to teach High Schoolers. I thought I'm going to have a hard time connecting to them but I really had a great time! Out of 14, only 1 was not able to make it to Day 5. Of course, I have my favorites: Bryan, Jeffrey and Kenneth. 

Every day except Day 5, we got to learn about Bible Characters and how God moved in their lives. I personally have been recharged and blessed with the opportunity to get to know them. 

Day 1: The Story of Jephthah
It was first time to encounter his name and his story. The story of an outcast who found refuge in his faith in the Lord. With his faith God blessed him to be the leader of other outcasts. They defeated the Ammobites and he became judge over their land for six years. 

Day 2: The story of Ruth and Naomi. I gave a challenge to each of them, would they choose to be Naomi and let the people around them see the kind of faith she has and eventually hear "I want your God to be my God." Or be Ruth and have that unwavering faith to a God she doesn't entirely know yet at that time. Ruth had  professed her faith and did not leave Naomi's side. Later on, in the land of Bethlehemjudah, Boaz fell in love with Ruth and had taken her for his wife and from their line Obed was born who fathered Jesse who then fathered David from whose lineage came Jesus Christ. 

Day 3: The story of Samuel and Eli. Eli was the priest in the tabernacle and Samuel was a worker in that tabernacle. While sleeping, he heard someone called him, he thought it was Eli and so he answered "Here am I". He wasn't aware until Eli told him that it was God calling him. By God's grace, he lived a pure life and had been a judge of their land for many years. 

Day 4: The story of Peter. He asked Jesus if it was enough to forgive who sinned him seven times. The Lord answered that forgiving should be seventy times seven. The kids were good! It was 490 times! So many chances!

I hope the kids learned something because I did. Every night after studying the lesson for tomorrow, I take time to reflect. 

*********************************

There are still a lot things to work on in terms of group dynamics with some of the volunteers and workers. I really hope I can help them with something. They are a bunch of talents and eager youngsters and maximizing their potentials as a group with really do a lot in their personal growth and for the church. 

Or is it just me who see all these negative things because I feel like an outcast? 

I am blessed that's what I always tell myself. So, I pray fo God to give me that courage to delve into a deeper commitment in Him. To trust Him fully like Ruth and live a pure like Samuel as I forgive others like Peter and live a life that tells His story like that of Naomi and share it to others like Eli. 

So I continue to live a life of gratefulness!

Tomorrow, I go back to my Modules. Oopss. Nope. That makes it Monday. Tomorrow, I go for a run, Medical Exam for my new job, a visit at ADMU for transfer credentials, lunch with Chloe,  Lego Exhibit at Resorts World Manila, and a party at Greenbelt with friends I fondly call titos and titas because they are older than me but I like their company.

Deactivating facebook has been good. It gave me more time for twitter and instagram and blogger. Tsk. Tsk. 

Papers are due on the 25th of April and 2nd of May. Waaaaaaaa! So help me God!




Meowmeow Badtrip

Ang post na ito ay puno ng kabadtripan. Read at your own risk. Hehehe

1. Ang init! Sabi ni Uncle mas mainit sa Perth, eh msgwi-winter na sa kanila ngayon eh.

2. Ang init! Gusto ko mag aircon kaso wala pa kong work. Wala pa kong pambayad sa magmamahal na namang singil sa kuryente sa buwan ng Mayo.

3. Ang init! Ayoko gumalaw kasi pagpapawisan ako. Dahil di ako gumagalaw sa pagtulog, nagka-stiff neck tuloy ako.

4. Ang init! Gustuhin ko man maghubad, mainit pa rin. Arrghhh.

5. Ang hirap maging masipag. Kelangan ko ng inspirasyon. Paorder ng kiss este kasipagan pls.

6. Nagdeactivate muna ko ng facebook. Hirap maging bum at makakalimuting may schooling pala ko. Nauubos ang oras ko sa kaka-stalk.

7. Ang haba na ng hair ko. Uy. Literal yan. Nakakatamad pa rin magsuklay.

8. Paano ko i-shi-ship ang mga libro papuntang CDO Boys Town? Help!

9. Pwede bang ipa-aircon ang buong Pilipinas?! Yung aircon na walang carbon footprint na maiiwan?! Asa!

10. Ang hirap maglaba ng mga puting damit. Pero ang sarap magsuot ng puting malinis at mabango.

11. Once nagsimula na ko sa work, ang daily route ko ay dadaan sa pinaka-polluted na lugar sa Metro Manila. Waaa. My skin. My nose. My face. Char lang. Iniisip ko kung pano magsusurvive from allergic rhinitis.


13. Akala mo lang hindi ako nagbigay ng chance. But I did. It's just that my guts said not to go further.

14. Wag mong itanong kung kelan ako magbubuntis. Di ako artista. Andami naming pusa. Buntis ulit si Sugar Oh Honey Honey.

15. Ang init sa Pilipinas!

posted from Bloggeroid

Randomthoughts 04.09.2015



7:09 PM
1.       Magdadalawang linggo na kong official bum. Nakakapanibago. Ang sarap gumising lagi ng 7am. Yung paggising ko, iisipin ko pa kung anong gagawin ko sa araw nay un. Kunyari, magseset ako sa utak ko, pero yung totoo, manonood lang talaga ko ng 2 movies, magbabasa ng kung anu-ano sa facebook. Magbabasa ng dyaryo, bubuksan ang ref at isasara kahit wala naman talaga kong kukunin, babalik sa higaan, matutulog, gigising dahil gutom, mag-iisip kung lalabas para kumain or magpapgutom na lang. Dahil na kokonsensya na ko sa pagiging bum ko, babangon ako at maliligo, at sisipagin na ko. LOL.
2.       Halos lahat ng mga posts sa fb ng aking mga connections ay about getaways. Ayokong ma-inggit. LOL. Gusto ko lang magpahinga. Naiinggit ako yes, pero wala na ko dun sa pity-level unlike before na sobrang naaawa ko sa sarili ko dahil may mga bagay akong gusting gawin at bilhin pero hindi ko magawa. Although gusto ko pa rin talaga magtravel, as I grow older, narealize kong mas kelangan kong unahin talaga yung mga simpleng bagay sa buhay na mas mahalaga tulad ng pahinga at makasama muna ulit ang pamilya sa isang ordinaryong araw. No rushing. No worries. Just plain catching up.
3.       Kapag nagkatrabaho na ulit ako, for sure, lalarga na naman. Sana mas malayo na ang mga susunod.
4.       Ni-meet ko ang isang set of friends ko sa Resorts World nung weekend, at ayun nga, ang sabi naman nila, ay i-enjoy ko lang ang bakasyon. Madali naman daw akong makakahanap ng trabaho dahil cute ako. Nyemas na friends! Pero kahit pano, nakakatuwang makita ulit sila kahit puro lang kalokohan ang mga pinaggagawa. Paglabas ko ng RW, gusto ko na agad maligo! Hahaha. Amoy yosi ang buhok ko at ang lagkit ng balat ko. Nainvite din akong magstaycation kung san sila naka-check in. Ayun, nakalibre ako ng ligo at aircon. Woohooo!Buti na lang may shuttle from there going to QC, ang pick up at drop off ay kung san ako laging bumababa.
5.       Pumayat na daw ako! Yahooo! Konting kembot pa para sa beachbody na yan! Kahit alam ko naming hindi ako makakasabay sa hype ng summer spree, babawi na lang ako sa mga panahong ang lahat ay nagkakakandakubang magtrabaho. LOL.
6.       Lahat ng housemates ko may work na. Ako na lang ang wala. Though yung totoo, dapat meron na kasi ni-turn down ko yung offer kasi di ko rin feel pa talaga that time. Marami din akong ina-eye na opportunities nun. Hindi na rin ako masyado in a hurry magwork unlike before na kelangan ko talagang magwork dahil sa mga iniisip kong gastusin.
7.       May gusto akong work, yun talaga yung hinihintay ko. Pinagpepray k okay Lord na ibigay Nya sakin yun, pero kung hindi, alam ko namang may better plans for me. Sabi nga ng boss ko, “ok lang maghintay, basta wag ka lang maging idle.”
8.       One term paper, one research paper, one exam to go, maitatawid ko na ang 2nd Sem ng akong schooling sa Open University. Bigla kong naumay magbasa ng mga technical na bagay. Gusto ko na lang ng mga Fiction at YA books. LOL. Hindi mahirap yung mga dinidiscuss naming sa ngayon. Mahirap maging masipag nang walang kasama L Shemai. Hugot pa more!
9.       Malapit na ang Mother’s Day. May bagong kantang ni-compose si Papa. Hanapin ko nga yung una, try ko ilagay saking #meowcollections. LOL
10.   Merong week-long activity sa church and dun muna ko nag-commit bago ko magworry about my next job.


7:45 PM

Ten Thousand Angels Cried

Stillness filled the heavens, on crucifixion day.
Some say it rained, I don't know if it's true.
Well, I can just imagine ten thousand angels cried
That would seem like rain to me and you.

The angels all stood ready to take him from the tree
They waited for the words from his voice.
And when he asked the father why has thou forsaken me.
They watched the saviour die of his own choice.

I've never seen ten thousand angels cry
But I'm sure they did
As they stood by
And watched the saviour die.

God turned his head away
He couldn't bear the sight
It must have looked like rain
When ten thousand angels cried.

As the sun slipped away
The skies turned to grey
And when jesus gave his all
That's when the tears began to fall

I've never seen ten thousand angels cry
But I'm sure they did
As they stood by
And watched the saviour die.

God turned his head away
He couldn't bear the sight
It must have looked like rain
When ten thousand angels cried.

It must have looked like rain
When ten thousand angels cried.

Cinderella on April Fools' Day

When talking about Disney princesses, Cinderella is the first name that comes to my mind. Though my favorite Disney movie had always been Tangled which features Rapunzel.

Since I am on holiday, I told myself that I will try to be that spontaneous girl that I used to be. Though I still had it planned. Laundry. Movie. TV Series. Sleep. Read. Stalk?. Bum. Sing. Relax. I had decided to devote the Holy Week to the things I had miss doing for the past two years. No browsing of job sites and  selective replies to emails. I was thinking of abstinence to social media, however, due to some reasons, I can’t. Someone might miss me or it’s the other way around :P Hehehe..

I started last Sunday J with a #Fambam! Yesterday, Monday, I did laundry. Folded clothes. Sorted books and ate that discounted cheese pizza at Sbarro for Php49. What a great day!Today I downloaded and watched Cinderella for my 3rd day of Bumming.

The story of Cinderella had always been associated with dreams coming true. When I was a child, I had always associated fairytales with:

a.      a damsel in distress and a prince coming to the rescue.
b.      a kiss of true love
c.       a happy everafter ending

After watching Cinderella and reading reviews and critics about it, this modern Cinderella story took it to a different level.

There’s more to see than just a happy everafter ending, it now includes:

Kindness

Cinderella used to live a very comfortable life with her very doting mother and merchant father. Her mother’s last words before she died was:

When there is kindness, there is goodness. When there is goodness, there is magic.

She attempted to go to the Royal Ball wearing her late mother’s gown. The stepmother, probably feeling threatened by her beauty and grace and do not want to be associated with her, tore her gown and leaving her hopeless to see the Prince Charming again. She never fought them back. Then, came magic! Her Fairy Godmother appeared and did everything so she can go to the Royal Ball and dance with the prince.

After all the abuse she had gone through with her stepmom and her daughters, in the end, Cinderella chose to forgive them. Leaving all those emotional baggage behind as she start a new life with Prince Charming Kit.

Courage

After her father died and her stepmom decided to keep her as a housemaid, she kept herself busy and occupied with chores so she can move on with her life.

Another one, the first time she met the prince in the forest, she bravely uttered:

“Just because it’s what’s done, doesn’t mean it’s what should be done.”

Letting the prince promise not to hunt and kill the stag.

Acceptance

This is my favorite one. Will always be.

Prince: Who are you?
Cinderella: I am Cinderella. Your majesty, I’m no princess. I have no carriage. No parents. No dowry. I do not even know if that beautiful slipper would fit but if it does, will you take me as I am? I’m only this country girl who loves you.
Prince: Of course I will, but only if you will take me as I am. An apprentice to learning his trade.

I played back that part several times. I tried to memorize the lines.

I am my Princess. I have dreams. In my dreams, I learned to have faith. No matter how cruel this world seems to be, I can still find kindness everywhere and I try to be one myself. No matter how cruel this world is, I take courage with me to face every challenge. Ultimately, I have never stop dreaming of finding my prince who will accept me as I am and to whom I will gladly do the same.

Today is April Fools’ Day. And I am dreaming.

It is a dream I am dreaming while I am awake. I may be a fool. But all I want is a love story that is mine and that is true.