Pabebe Moment

Just a few days ago, I had some sort of struggle. A guy friend I had known for years invited me over to hangout at his apartment. He recently just got single, his ex-girlfriend had moved out to live with a new partner. Leaving him alone with the cat I would always see on photos. Making the story short, he wants me to go to his place, stay overnight, “hangout” and what else?

It was tempting to say “Yes! Sure! Pick me up after school.” But, I just gave him answers hinting that it was not something I look forward to and that it is not how I look forward to getting started with what seem to be our “naudlot chance” before.

Saying “Yes” to the invite could lead to some possible end results as follows:

1.      Friends with Benefits
2.      Romance and companionship
3.      One Night Stand

Who wouldn’t say yes to the possibility of Romance? But the probability is very low at 33%. Still a possibility they would say. Chances. Chances. Others would say.

I was PMSing when he asked me. I probably would have just said “Yes!” if I let myself be blown away by my vulnerability and neediness at that time. Who wouldn’t want to be cuddled? He never called me again after I turned down the invite. What does that mean?

I don’t think I can ever be good at being single but I think I know what I deserve and my worth.

He would have been a good catch. Or maybe not really. I wouldn’t know. Not that I am not giving it a chance but the way it would have started was something predictably would have not blossomed to something romantically ideal over time.

I’ve kissed a frog before, for sure, it won’t be difficult to see another frog and it would be stupid to kiss another one. Einstein said something that goes like: “Slipping on the same stone is foolishness.” But honestly, it is tempting to kiss thousands of frogs hoping that the prince will be one of them. Who wants a frog when there are a lot of fishes in the ocean?

In a society nowadays which sees changing partners like changing clothes, on a trial and error basis, dating sites, chatrooms and endless “hugot lines”, it is difficult to differentiate love over lust, short-term over lifetime, true over rebound and everything else in between.

I would like to believe that he is somewhere out there, just gathering all the courage, wittiness and creativity he could get to invite me, after all, I am not the easy to convince when it comes to things like these. 


All I know is, I am for keeps. 

2 comments:

  1. Ugh... men are pigs. I'm gonna get a sex change soon. I am so disgusted and ashamed of my sex.

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    Replies
    1. Ah eh... Hindi naman lahat. Nagkataon din lang ito siguro... Hehehe

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