Ancestral Purpose


While I was in Thailand, one of the best memory I got was a conversation about "ancestral purpose" with other 4 Filipinos over 3 boxes of pizza, pasta and chicken wings. 

That our present lives are sort of directed by our ancestral purpose. And it will always be for the good. 

Today, over groupchat, I mentioned about my subconscious attempt of job search. Then, T, the wisest amongst us 4, sent me this photo she took during my presentation and in carabao filipino she said:
"Kat! Inspiration para yung job search mo. Yung presentation mo napaka galeng!"




So, the presentation was taken positively and I felt so privileged to be done to open the discussions about the social implications of how teachers teach a second language particularly in third world countries who used to be colonies of english-speaking nations. 

So, what is my "ancestral purpose"? 

I feel like leaving my job because I really feel that this is not the place that I see myself growing. I also have challenges dealing with the huge gap in teaching competence of my local teacher. I wanted to teach him but he works like a robot that needs to be dictated with every move and how to do things and not like a thinking human being. You can only imagine how different that is with working with people with different skill sets. 

Every day, I feel frustrated. Every day, I ask myself why I am here. I deserve to be somewhere better. Then I stop myself there. What right do I have to say that I deserve to be somewhere better when I can't even have the temper to deal with a differently-competent colleague. I am not generous enough with sharing my skills and knowledge just because everytime I tell him something, he wants me to spoon feed him with how to do things. Like a dog on a leash and just know how to follow. 

Going back to my ancestral purpose.... 

I don't want to leave Japan yet. It is just too safe and so comfortable to live in. My father said that our family lineage had origins in Japan. During WWII, my father's family never had a story of a reserved officer who served during the war. He said that it was because our great great grandfather was Japanese. Though, our last name doesn't really sound like Japanese. Oh well the last two syllables of the three-syllable family name does sound Japanese.... 

Also, I find joy and enthusiasm whenever I get to help my students understand that learning a second language is hard work and it can be done.

So, maybe... maybe... my ancestral purpose still lies in here or within Southeast Asia, where most third world nations lie and it is still in the advocacy of education.

With that, I should be more persistent in finishing graduate school with flying colors, learn to be patient with my colleague and myself, embrace the discomfort that I am feeling and pray for guidance-- from the ancestors and from God Almighty. 

Comments

  1. interesting ang tungkol sa ancestral purpose. hehe parang maganda ring pagnilay-nilayan kung ano ang akin. hehe :)

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