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Dreams

 The other night, I dreamt of my hair becoming beautifully curled and long and I love it so much. I googled the meaning and it says that dreaming of long hair means re-birth and self-discovery. I was so excited for it and just happy. It felt like a tinge of hope that I can still pursue things that I had put on hold for so long now.  Then, the other night I dreamt of meeting my friends and going to work. In the dream, I was so eager to meet my classmates but they were not as excited as I was but in my head I was calculating how much time would I be spending with them so I can still make it on time to work.  I was able to meet them but like I said, they were not that excited to meet me and so I took my leave but in the parking lot, there was car blocking the ramp so I couldn't exit. I tried to push the blockage and so I was deadbeat but I was still able to reach the parking lot and in my head I was calculating the amount of time I have left so I can reach the place in time ...

Friday Morning Thoughts.

A few paragraphs here and there, and a draft has been made. Re-scheduling events has been pushing back the implementation of trainings in the school but I cant help but be also grateful for it coz it gives me time to be able to prepare for it more and more but the pressure it brings is nothings different that it initially gives.  November personal fitness plans hasnt been going as planned. The Wake Up at 5AM Project hasn't been launched with the success rate of 10-10 days of having done it in the month. Well, there are still days for it. Too early to give up on oneself.  This new-but-not-new table I had got is giving me productivity and I love it and grateful for it and I couldn't be more excited for the other things that I will be able to complete with this investment.  Closing in 2024 with forward steps is the goal, and meeting 2025 with more concrete tasks to accomplish is the plan. 

Move It Monday

I did it today :) 

How to Self-Sabotage or Not

If there is one topic I can probably write about so well, but still not with a good outline just yet, it will probably be on the topic of self-sabotage: A Guidebook on How to Self-Sabotage. For the past years since the pandemic ended, I seem to have lost a lot of not all, the joy in exploring, discovering and pushing for writings. A lot of things happened since then, both good and bad and I couldn't be more thankful for finding my person.  Finding and living a life with my person has so far been the highlight of my days. Every day, I am grateful and happy for it. As he works on growing himself in front of me, I felt a bit of shame, telling myself that I used to have the same attitude, what has changed?  The academic struggles seem to have been forgotten, the joy for journaling waded for a bit and it appeared days were always busy when the truth is, it wasn't. It was just passing through like it is supposed to be and I have been losing all the time by staring, scrolling, and sp...

Create(?) (!) (.)

I was so lost at home that I couldnt accomplish anything that D suggested I go and work at my friend’s cafe in the city. True enough, I was able to do things and more. Capped it off with a conversation about creative work with one of the foreign people I know and I am fond of as well. She has been writing and sometimes not writing and I wish I can have the same passion for writing as she has right now. I always tell myself, I wanna be able to write but Im not even writing anything.  So what do I create? I tell her she should just keep writing whatever brain dump she has when I should really be telling and pushing myself to do the same. 

Personal Leadership Hour

I cant remember the last time I woke up really so early intentionally to do something like exercise, read an abstract of a research or write on my journal.  Well, today, it is happening. Time check: 4:09 AM JST as I write this and as much as I would like to exercise,  I think today, I will just write this down.  I actually feel good waking up at this hour and I would like to challenge myself to keep doing this. After this, I'll prepare a deck for presentation about Lesson Planning and then go back to bed after that.  It feels good to be able to do this stuff again.  I just finished reading the book The Leader Who Had No Title and I felt so empowered and awestruck how to live a life like that again and again. I am reminded that I have the choice and every opportunity to live the kind of life I want. And I had always wanted to be an "academic"/researcher and eversince I was single I had fallen short of acting like one and so my progress had been so slow to no prog...

Hump Wednesday It is

Finally changed the alarm clock from 6:45 to 7:30.  The daily temperature is getting cooler and just more cozy to just stay in bed and roll. But no. We don't want that.  Submitted my re-admission request for my master's degree in UPOU. Hoping it will get me back up and running, but honestly just praying for a mentor, an advisor that can lead me through. But I guess, that will just be myself.  I only have more than a year to spare for this selfish goal. After that, I have to focus on home-making and making use of my genes and of course, taking care of my husband. It has been quite a journey for us.  This year has been an opportunity to recover and move and hopefully get back into a healthier shape that is more ready for what is yet to come.