What is stopping you?

365 QOTD

What is stopping you?

Hmmm.. Good question.

From dreaming?
Nothing. That one is for free.

From working on dreams?
The fear of the unknown.
Sometimes, being rejected for a number of times, makes me re-consider my options. The pain of rejections is just something very difficult to handle and to forget. It takes a lot of effort to pursue a dream knowing that the chances of rejection is very high. But rather I'd rather try then get hurt or rejected than having that regretful feeling.

From buying that sneakers?
I don't have money. Or let's just have I have other priorities and I still have functionally, wearable sneakers.

From waking up early?
I sleep late and I am lazy. I know... Gotta pick up my butt and remind myself of my unfathomable dreams.

From praying for the ONE?
I don't have someone to call my own as of now. The search goes on until I can finally say I am home. No matter what happens, I still pray that one day, after all my small attempts of trying this world to be a better place, I will go home to someone I can call my own.

How busy was your day today?

365 QOTD

How busy was your day today?

Hmmm.. Work-wise, it wasn't so busy. I tried to busy myself with revamping the plan for the Aug. 19th's Read Aloud Event.

I am thinking of a total revamp from the original plan and additional craft activities for the day. It had been awhile since I had prepared for a storytelling activity. And it's one of my favorite parts of teaching! Overacting is never overrated. Of course, I also love conducting science experiments and collaborative learning.

I also did some paperwork for my online banking request from my local bank in PH. I had sent them a very lengthy e-mail 2 days ago and I had just received their response and instructions to proceed with the request. Hopefully, this gets done while I still here so this is one of my to-do list when I get to for holiday on January. I don't wanna spend my first week of 2018 chasing offices for my documents, transactions and licenses. My biggest regret really was that I didn't renew my driver's license before I left. That would have been a major dealbreaker with my stay here. But, of course, there is always a time for everything. It will all just fall into its proper places.

What I looked forward to was the dinner with my Japanese friends! I've met them through the English Cafe I use to attend on Wednesdays if I have time. But tonight, I had to meet them after work hours. We went to this little yakitori place downtown. The place was a typical small-scale shop where people sit in bar stools and the cook/shopkeeper cooks the food in front of the patrons.

I like being around them coz they are fun and light-hearted. They are also very generous with information about Japanese lifestyles and trivias. So, I get to learn a lot while enjoying their company.

Ended the day with watching the latest GOT Season 7 episode. The opening scene was a total badass one. So, bring all those spoilers on!

Adulting is Hard

365 QOTD
Did you act your age today?

For most part, I think, I did.

I woke up early and cooked a decent breakfast. Went to the last day of the Japanese class. Just too bad that I wasn't able to attend the Graduation Ceremony (frown)

Still, it was some sort of accomplishment. Plus, I really learned a lot from it. It is now a matter of courage of applying it to my daily conversations.

I tried to prepare something more interactive and interesting for each class that I had today. Time flew so fast (happy)

I think I flunk of the money management thing as always. I forgot to withdraw funds for our gift for our Sensei. Then, when I already had the money, I implusively bought something at Daiso--- a cute bento box, a lunch box cloth and garters. Haayst.
I also forgot to pay my Leonet service. I was actually afraid that they might have disconnected my service as of today. So far, it is still working. (omg) Internet is Life. Please spare me your mercy.

Contemplating about my current financial situation took most of my concentration while eating ice cream on lunch break. I really am an impulsive buyer, that's why I need to make sure that I get to secure my savings for long term accumulation of assets. I grew up having not so much and almost begging for whatever others can give, I don't wanna go back to those moments and I want my parents to enjoy their adulthood too. So, now, how to I prevent myself from buying things I don't really need? ----- I need to keep the funds where I will have second thoughts getting into.

Hayst, Adulting is hard.
Why was I chosen to be one?

Nothing Extraordinary Today.

Today is definitely one for the books! Not because extraordinary things happened but just because it was an ordinary day with ordinary events but extraordinary experience and reflections for me.

I am still not successful in getting up from bed early, though I woke up as early as 7am. I stayed in bed until 9am since I don't go to the conversation classes anymore, I made a quick morning trip to the library to study(?) , more of like trying to practice writing a few kanji characters, then didn't prepare to go out until 11am to meet my friends.

I had always wanted to visit the museums around and so today, we agreed to visit the Miyazaki Science Center.

A modern science museum designed for kids and wannabe kids, there are really a lot of learning points inside. Most of the exhibitions had English translations and can be understood. My favorite is the exhibition of the different sources of renewable energy!

After that, I had time for my favorite chore: the laundry.

Then, I asked Mr. Y and Ms. Y if they will go to the English Cafe, coz if they will, I might as well go and have a catch up with them. It had became an interesting night coz apart from catching up with Mr. Y, I have met a young lad who has so much passion for computer programming.

Mr. Y said that if I am free, I can come to Jenga night.

Tita G said that we might go to onsen that night and so I said that I will just be at downtown and she can pick me up from there. But she cancelled and so I had the chance to come to Jenga Night!

At first, I wasn't sure if coming to Jenga was a good decision because it was roundtable discussion for Japanese people. It was their chance to speak about certain topics without hesitation about the topic. I felt that I had gone a bit overboard about expressing my thoughts and opinions at some point. I forgot that I am not fluent in Japanese at all! The conversation flowed to a more lighter topics of travelling and hitchhiking until it was time to call it a night.

I felt relieved that the host said, "Please come again." Next time, I will be more careful with expressions and sharing of ideas. Also, I will try to speak more Japanese eventhough it is full of mistakes. I will be more sensitive about my opinions and make sure that I try to keep my questions within the topic.

I'd rather practice my Japanese in conversations like this than in a bar.

I learned so much today, reconnected with friends and met amazing people too.

Today, was definitely a good day.


365 QOTD
Who inspires you?

I am inspired by so many people:
1. My family, I always want to be able to provide for my family.
2. friends who work for the government, for it is very hard to keep an upright moral while working for the government
3. people who always wanted to make the world a better place.


Act Like One

To all teachers who claim to be real teachers but not really acting like real ones:

It's not how much knowledge you can impart to your students.

It's all about helping them build their confidence that they can learn and do anything they want in life.

When they come to you to learn, it's not all about you and how much you know.

It's all about them and their potentials.

So, don't ask if they understand,
but ask: What have you understood?

Back Online

I decided to go back to my online teaching job!

Woohoo! Crazy as it may seem, it is something that can keep me occupied and busy and probably build connections with over time.

With a pay a little more than 400 yen per hour, I think this is a good way to keep myself busy and entertained and avoid thinking too much. Plus, I get to have little savings in my peso bank account seriously untouched until I am back home for holiday.

An hour a day, 7 days a week, with almost 5 months to go, I think I would have decent money for daily coffee at Starbucks for a 2-week vacation. Naah.. Probably would do a Mystery Manila Challenge with my sibs.

Can't wait for holiday! 5 months to go!

Ooh life, Ooh day.

I am thinking of skipping tonight's nikki entry but here I go, thumbing away.

The days have been unfriendly because of this massive headache I keep experiencing. It could be because of the weather, the time of the month or just being frustrated with making attempts to make some financial transactions. Add to that the thunderstorm and thunders and heavy rains. I survived. I survived but can't really say, "keep bringin 'em on." I need time to reenergize.

10 kanjis every morning. That's my personal challenge which started last Thursday.

My Kobo e-reader has arrived and I have loaded it with some books I look forward to reading.

Ooh life. Ooh day.
No matter how shitty a day can be, it's a beautiful life if spent with the right people.

365 QOTD
A funny thing happened on the way to _____________.

...... on the way to the pantry. Ms. E squeezed on cheel of my butt and I screamed so loud.

Never had luck

I had my Saturday night planned to be as usual solo-binge-watching then reading a few blogs I follow then writing this nikki entry.

But the universe had another plan. On my way home, Tita G texted me and said that she prepared Pork Stew for dinner and that she is bringing it to my place so we can have dinner.

We had dinner picnic style and then, she asked if I can mix Kiwi Sour, so Kiwi Sour it was!

Dinner came and dinner finished. It's time to be alone again.

My life is quite unorganized. I used to have a routine, but now it is quite a mess. A good source of distraction but still my system longs for that routinary order of living.

Ms. E jokingly told me that she wrote on the tanzaku that I get to have a lovelife so my life won't be boring. Lol. I thought she was joking but she pointed me the tanzaku and she did write what she said. Bwahaha.

I appreciate the urgency that people around me has been putting on me but I've long given up on the idea. Maktub. Whatever is written, it is written.

For now, Im going to bed in my favorite undies, a little  tipsy and a just a little bit of every thing else.

Good night world, we will conquer tomorrow.

365 QOTD
Have you played the lottery?
Nope. No luck on it. Never had luck on gambling.

DUROG days ahead.

I skipped breakfast today. Unusual. I just had coffee latte before going to Japanese class and a sandwich for lunch.

Tita G and I went shopping after lunch til 3pm. It was my first time to visit that GU Branch in Miyazaki City. Since I am not really a fashion addict, I usually just go shopping during SALE days. I got myself a pair of pants, a statement shirt, a blouse for work and a white blouse for my wannabe pabebe days ahead. Counter payment is automated. Just put everything in a basket, put the basket inside a small cabinet underneath the cashier's booth and then, on the screen in front of you, all the purchases will appear with the total amount, then on the left side, there is a slot where you put money for payment. Then, take the basket out, go to another table nearby and put the stuff in a plastic bag then all done. 

After that, I went home and passed by the Lawson store near my home coz I saw my friend's car, so I thought he is on duty and I just wanna drop by and say Hi. But he wasn't at the counter. So, I didn't get to say Hi.

Though it's a little late, I did the laundry and cleaned the kitchen and the toilet. Decluttered. Decluttered. Still, there is clutter.

I got caught up with How To Get Away with Murder Season 3 and it's becoming more unpredictable and more violent for me. 

Also, this is one of those days I wish I have a Japanese boyfriend! I am having a hard time making bank transactions and applying for a debit card. I just need  debit card. Not a credit card. As per online forums, one can get a debit card via Rakuten Bank just by applying online. Well, the application is in Japanese! Luckily, a new friend offered to help me out with it to do the translation and step by step process however, since I am not really comfortable of giving other inconvenience, as much as possible, I tried to figure out most of it but ended up reaching out. Still, I tried doing it my way of screencaptures and translations by Google Translate and so I ended up with a very bad headache again. 

My Kobo e-reader is on it's way! I am so looking forward to filling it up with books I can never really read. LOL.

I am ending this day on a happy note coz my favorite blogger is back online! Cher Jo of Metaphorically Speaking is back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Back to work tomorrow with lots of campaign activities on the side, which means, DUROG days ahead. 

365 QOTD 
Who did you text today?
No one. I actually miss having a textmate. 

Monthly Suffering

Headache, body ache and how I long to submerge myself in a tub full of warm water but I can coz it's red alert day.
Where is justice? Where is peace?

Tried opening my very first email address and it is still working with more than 10k emails on it. Took me a couple of hours to clean up the inbox. Woohoo. How nice to see a clean inbox and reading old emails to my father and my cousin. I was such a jejemon. Earth, eat me alive.

Almost halfway ready with the materials for a big activity on the 17th. I can't wait for that day to be over. I swore that I won't eat pancakes until that day is over.

To commemorate the Tanabata Story, as a Japanese custom, I asked one of my students to translate my wish to Japanese and write it also in a tanzaku. 

My wish is: That I may always have wisdom in every decision I make. 

I signed it with my name written in Katakana and hung it at the bamboo tree outside our office.

My digital weighing scale is giving me a reading that is 3 kilograms lighter than what I know of my current weight. F&^* you weighing scale! So, even things lie, not just humans. Whatever happened to honesty?! 

I keep buying stuff that I think I would use for studying but I never really sit down and study, instead I keep scrolling in social media. Whatever happened to priorities and responsible adulthood? 

On my last class, the last question for the student was, What is the happiest moment in your life?
She answered that it was the day her son was born. Then, on the Shima no Sensei Jdrama series I am watching, in episode 4, the protagonist also mentioned that the happiest moment of her life was when she gave birth to her daughter in the series. Both are reminders that one of the most significant life in a woman is to become a mother. My biological clock maybe ticking but if ever, will I ever be a good mother?

And I am asking myself about that while I am still suffering with dysmenorrhea and headache.

I tried popping 2 tabs of those OTC meds they have here in Japan, but it didn't have any effect at all.
Then, I remembered that my anti-inflammatory prescription back in PH was already Meloxicam 15mg.

Thank goodness tomorrow is rest day.

365 QOTD
What movie are you looking forward to?

Foreigner. The one with Jackie Chan and Pierce Brosnan on it. 

Tuesday Complaint List

1. It's the time of the month. The sudden gush. Ugh.
2. I bought another 100 board lot stocks for a renewable energy company. That was suppose to be for a t-shirt at Uniqlo!
3. It's raining. But why is it still hot in Miyazaki?!
4. I want root beer. Why is there no rootbeer anywhere at the grocery? Rootbeer with vanilla ice cream on top. Yes, in my imagination, it must be heaven.
5. Body pains. Can I just stay in bed all day? Or where can I get affordable massage here? Why is everything so expensive?!
6. Based on a certain survey, my annual salary here in Japan is still below minimum. Why did I even move here? LOL. Oopps. Lemme double check if this is really supposed to be in this list.
7. I think I slept around 4am. So, please dont mess with me, I know Kung Fu.

It's just 12:45 PM, so the rest are to follow. LOL.

No Such Perfect Day

Today started with a Sunday-before-going-to-church video call from home, with Papa asking what will be my itinerary for the day.

Though my sibs were already aware of my would-be whereabouts, they didn't tell Papa until he asked me about it. As always, he wanted me to find a good church where I can do fellowship with and learn the language.

The day started smoothly. Breakfast was cereal, to which Mama was not happy about. Then a pro-longed video chat until we all realized that its time for them to leave for church and for me to pack up my stuff for the day. But before that, I also had a conversation with Mr. L whom I met coz he started reading my blog. We were supposed to have a video chat a few weeks ago, I think, however, there seem to had been a lack of understanding how technology works. LOL. But, all good. I guess, this time, we had started at the right foot.

In a hurry, I just stuffed my bag with things I thought I would need, like extra shirts and a pair of slippers, sunblock lotion, powerbank, and a book. Then, I went to see my kind friends who invited me to go to Aoshima. They are sibs-- a boy and a girl- Mr. Y and Ms. C. Though I speak very poor Nihonggo and she struggles with her English, Ms. C and I seem to get along pretty well. She is very accommodating and hospitable. She makes sure that I feel comfortable with them, asking about things that may interest me and makes sure that I have fun. Same with her brother, Mr. Y. He has been very helpful for me and Ms. C get connected. He translates both ways and encourages both me and Ms. C to speak both languages vice versa.

I am very grateful that I bumped into them last Sunday and I do look forward to spending more fun days with them coz I get to learn a lot and also share a lot of whatever I know in terms of language exchange. They also remind me that life is good coz we have wonderful siblings-- whom we have fights, misunderstandings, arguments and share more good things than the bad things.

I also got to meet, their friend, Natsumi--she helped me fill out my form at the bouldering gym and I think she also took pictures of us while we were having fun at the wall climbing activity earlier ;)

We had lunch at Bondi Cafe, then they did business for another hour and then we headed to the bouldering camp for another couple of hours of challenge and cheers.

When I arrived at my place, I just removed my bag, took off my shirt and rolled on the floor then fell asleep. When I woke up, I remember that I have to go to the post office to pick up an item and then go to the library to return some books. Then, headed to the grocery for the week's supply.

I planned to prep food for the week however I noticed that I still have food in the fridge that needs to be consumed first so as not to be wasted. I ought to stick to my budget if I want to not feel guilty about spending on Sundays. If I keep myself from buying cooked meals on work days, I get to have enough money to spend for the weekend without feeling guilty that I had to touch my emergency funds.

Then, the not-so good news came while having dinner. Nanay Inday passed away today. She has been battling diabetes along with its complications, had been in and out of the hospital and under severe medication since early last year. It was a struggle to see. I grew up knowing that she was really a grandmother to me, to all of us. Though not related by blood, we had shared many good memories with her and her family.

I guess, a day can't really be describe as perfect if its just filled with happy stories. There is no such perfect day.

But today was one GOOD day with so many things to be grateful for-- the gift of friends, family, life and surprises.

365 QOTD
Who was the last person you saw today?

The last person I saw today was my sister, Bebz. She made a quick video call to say good night.