Life of a Kat

Fourth time to fail JLPT. Not a good intro, I know, but that's also the 4th time that I really haven't any effort nor pressure on myself to get something with the obvious results of failure.  The inner motivation and purpose wasn't really there. And if I just put a little more effort, maybe just another couple of weeks focused on the readings, maybe, maybe, the test results would have been different.  The test score fell short of 4 points. That accumulated score in general wasn't really a result of focused study but of tiny bits of studying here and there for the past 6 years. Imagine if I had put a little bit of obsession on it like how I put effort on other commitments I have signed up for and get a more satisfactory result.    I am sad yet, overall happy coz my friends who really needed the passing results nailed it.  As I try to keep a more focused and meaningful engagements, it is obviously about time to give myself that passing score it deserves that event...

I realized that watching House MD with quite consistency felt like reading to me. Is thay an excuse or is it really what it feels to me?  On my long drive on my way here to Kanoya, I also enjoyed listening to the audio of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F and it felt good. In some way, it was a good recall of the pages and thoughts I have certainly tried to absorb from the moment I have read of it and also forgotten the moment I let things fall apart.  I am not fond of watching movies without subtitles, that was thecresding part, I think.  I do miss the feeling of reading quietly, lost in the text, my physical body at rest while my whole mind has its own boob tube inside, scenes and people change as I read, I have the power to put me in the situation then and there.   I like the feel of writing as if I al slowly painting a picture, not perfect coz in no way I have been good with art, but somewhat a Picasso-esque mode of cubism, patching thoughts and ideas to make it l...

It’s a Friday morning and  here I am waiting for my coffee to drip, the laundry to finish and of course, the next episode of House MD.  Yes, House MD, that medical drama that was so famous back in 2004 onwards. I’m just on Season 3 right now. Oh also, I just completed watching Crash Landing on You late in 2023.  Today, after all these things, I have to start readings, outlines for this month’s training, re-write previous trainings, go to the gym (?) ugh I have just been hating that place lately just because it is always crowded and not enough machine and I can’t use the studio to practice ropeflow. It wasn’t a very good choice to sign up but it was also a good choice to get me started with getting back to movement.  And I can’t just break that daily streak of movement today because it’s cold!!!! And that big warm bath and onsen in there would be good to get started with afternoon work. Aaaashhhh.  Before all these shenanigans, I gotta figure out what’s for lunch...