Still a Failed.

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Fourth time to fail JLPT. Not a good intro, I know, but that's also the 4th time that I really haven't any effort nor pressure on myself to get something with the obvious results of failure. 

The inner motivation and purpose wasn't really there. And if I just put a little more effort, maybe just another couple of weeks focused on the readings, maybe, maybe, the test results would have been different. 

The test score fell short of 4 points. That accumulated score in general wasn't really a result of focused study but of tiny bits of studying here and there for the past 6 years. Imagine if I had put a little bit of obsession on it like how I put effort on other commitments I have signed up for and get a more satisfactory result. 
 
I am sad yet, overall happy coz my friends who really needed the passing results nailed it. 

As I try to keep a more focused and meaningful engagements, it is obviously about time to give myself that passing score it deserves that eventually can be an additional credential for whatever career path I choose to create out of what I have right now. 

Self, you deserve that A but only if you work for it. Let's get that, shall we? 

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