One Sunday Night

It's a cold Sunday afternoon. I am to meet a friend at the mall not far from us when I received a message from one of my college bestfriends-- "Kat, ikakasal na ko sa June, sana makapunta kayo ni Chie."

I suddenly felt like walking on a slow motion. Then out of the blue, my tears start falling. I'm happy for my friend, and I also felt sad for myself-- all out of the blue.

The Flashback

Archi, me and Carding are College buddies, from first year up until graduation, we were classmates. We shared almost all academic success, extra-curricular activities, drinking sessions, broke days, heartbreaks, music almost anything friendship could offer. 

I've seen both guys fall in love, fall out of love, how they became mushy when their in love, and get totally screwed at it.

Archie got married a couple of years ago to his girlfriend of 1.5 years. Back then, I am happily in love with my then boyfriend. Carding, was having some struggle with his relationship with the mother of his daughter until they finally decided to part ways and the kid was taken by the mother. Then the three of us, had rarely see and talk anymore. 

The Now

My tears can't stop from falling, it's like their on a race on my cheeks. My eyes are red and puffy once again. I almost forgot that I am to meet someone for a date that night. I am happy for Carding, that finally, he had decided to settle down and start his own family, for good. He used to be restless, carefree and just full of adventure.

Archie and Tin are happily married until now, they had recently celebrated their wedding anniversary. I met them right before Christmas and I can still see the spark and sweetness in them being together. I can't help but still feel "kilig" for them.

I don't have a hanky, no tissue on my bag, no nothing to wipe the tears. The back of my hands are all wet and the tears are still on a race. I called Arch, good thing he answered right on the first call, he knew that I was crying and we both laugh at my reaction. He remembered, I had the same reaction when he told me that he decided to marry her girlfriend. He knows that I am happy for Carding, no doubt about that.

I had a bad break up with my ex-boyfriend and I had decided to spend my time with family and friends for now. Almost a year had passed and I can say that everything is going well. There are just times that I can't help but be sad for myself. The break up experience had gave me doubts about commitment and relationships.

The Date.

He told me he is inside a certain cafe, unfortunately, I felt like not going there anymore because of I'm just not feeling well at all. I just wanna curl up in bed and sleep. Tomorrow, I will be fine. I am just a few more steps away from the door when he saw me, he looked bothered, my eyes were a sore and red and tears just started racing down again. What a horrible way to spend Sunday with someone whom I haven't seen for a long time. 

The date went well anyway. We spent the night at a midnight food market with street foods and good music, I was able to forget that I am lonely and sad.