Saturday Morning Sob

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I want to be with my "someone" that's for sure. But how? My Ted Mosby hasn't found me yet. Had he travelled back in time to tell me, "See you."? And that in the next few days or months, we are meant to meet, be friends, fall in love with each other, get married, raise two kids and live happily ever after?

I am in one of those days that I can't understand myself why I am so sad. But if I would look around me, I am in a place that I should be thankful for, and that should be enough for me not to be sad. This feeling of discontentment is such a morning wrecker. But I can't stop myself from feeling it. I just gotta let it flow. 

It had been awhile that I had sobbed and cried because of longing for someone I cannot be with. I don't even know why it keeps happening to me. Despite all the good things that come my way, why cant this someone be good as well? Why does the balance have to be in this side of my life? 


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My Ted Mosby, if you have found me and sees me pushing back, please don't give up on me just yet. Please convince me that this is all possible for me, for us to happen. 

Maybe you will find me at a time that I don't even know if things are meant to be real and that I deserve it. I deserve someone as a partner whom I would explore things with, be stupid with, pick me up when I am overly stupid, like I am right now. So, please don't give up on me easily. Convince me. Hug me, kiss me, love me. Until it is me who wouldn't want to let you go. 


**********

It felt good to cry. 

A long day ahead of me, but I will be fine. 

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